School Trip
by XenaFan74656
Summary: Rachel and Eddie get closer during a school trip...Set after the bowling alley scene in seasons four. This was the first fanfic I wrote, so please don't judge too harshly!


**Rachel**

Rachel eyed the coach with some trepidation. Admittedly, this trip had been her idea and deep down she was sure that the students would benefit from the opportunity to take part in the Duke of Edinburgh Award Scheme and, if nothing else, it would look good on their university applications. Despite this, Rachel was rather regretting her decision to run the expedition part of the award herself - she's never liked camping. She also couldn't shake the somewhat cynical feeling that most of the kids who'd signed up for the trip just wanted an excuse to skip lessons for three days and were going to take every opportunity to hitch lifts with passing strangers and hang out in the local pubs instead of walking anywhere. Normally, this was the kind of challenge Rachel relished, but not today. She could cope with the kids wrecking the campsite, she could cope with three days of Steph's gossiping, Grantly's complaining and Jasmine's endless enthusiasm, but she didn't know if she could cope with three days of Eddie. Not after what had happened at the bowling alley. She wasn't ready for a relationship yet, she wasn't ready to show him her scar and she wasn't ready to forget the traumas of earlier relationships.

Rachel glanced around her and her breath caught in her throat. Eddie was getting out of his car on the other side of the car park. Rachel was ashamed of the way her heart sped up when she looked at him, the way her breathing quickened. She sensed within herself a depth of feeling which she didn't know if she had the energy or the courage to face up to yet.

**Eddie**

They hadn't spoken since that moment of closeness in the bowling alley. Rachel had left quickly following a phone call from a distraught Philip who needed a lift home from the gig after Bolton and Paul had resumed their usual bullying. Then, the next morning she had gone off on a three day course in London. He'd phoned her several times and sent endless texts, but she hadn't replied. He hoped it was just because she was busy, but suspected that Rachel was repeating her old trick of pulling away from her feelings at the last second.

Eddie sighed as he got out of his car. He wasn't sure how to approach her, what to say to her. If they had been in a normal work context then it would have been easy to slip back into the old routine. This field trip though was a new situation where boundaries, rules and routines had not yet been established. If Eddie had had his way then he would have run over to Rachel, taken her in his arms and kissed her the instant he saw her, but he knew that this would only scare her off which was the last thing he wanted to do.

He caught sight of her then, standing by the coach. She was dressed casually in jeans and that leather jacket of hers which showed every detail of her slim figure. It was a windy day and her short reddish-blond hair whipped around her face. Eddie was utterly convinced that she was the most beautiful creature on Earth.

For a moment, their eyes met, but all too soon, Rachel looked away. As her eyes left his, Eddie felt an almost physical pain. He longed for her to hold him in her eyes again, he longed to gaze at her perfect face, but Rachel had turned her back on him completely now. He felt thoroughly miserable as he walked towards the coach and yet, he was still determined to somehow win over the only woman he had ever truly loved.

**Rachel**

Rachel busied herself with getting everyone onto the coach as smoothly as possible. She felt Eddie's eyes on her, but kept her back to him, involving herself in a conversation with Staph. By the time she turned back to the coach, Eddie was already on board. Rachel got onto the coach herself and, after a few words to the students about safety on school trips, she looked around for a place to sit down. Eddie was sat on his own at the front, the empty space next to him was inviting and yet terrifying. His arm was resting along the top of the vacant seat. Rachel couldn't stop herself from imagining what it would be like to sit there, to casually lean back into him, to feel his fingertips gently brush her shoulder. Perhaps he would put his arm around her and whisper in her ear...

'You can sit next to me miss!' Bolton's voice startled her out of her daydream.

Rachel smiled, 'Tempting as that offer is Bolton, I'm not sure Janeece would like it.'

Eddie was looking at her, his eyes inviting, but Rachel spotted an empty seat next to Jasmine and hastily sat down.

Jasmine turned to her, smiling 'I'm so excited about this trip. It's a really great opportunity for the kids and I just love camping...' Rachel let Jasmine's voice wash over her. When Jasmine was in one of her enthusiastic moods, it was enough to nod in the right places and occasionally mutter words of agreement.

Rachel's eyes wandered over the coach. Tom and Davina were sat on the other side of the coach, talking quietly and Grantly was asleep in the seat in front of them. Directly in front of Rachel were Matt and Steph, gossiping, and, in front of them, was Eddie. He was staring out of the window, lost in thought. Rachel's eyes roamed over the back of his head, the memory of the kiss in the bowling alley was still fresh in her mind and she could still feel his soft hair beneath her fingers, she could still feel his hands on her back, taste his lips on hers...

'Are you alright?' Jasmine had noticed her silence.

'Yes...yes, I'm fine. Just zoned out for a second there...what were you saying?'

Jasmine launched back into the story she was telling, something about Steph and a karaoke competition, while Rachel resumed her study of the back of Eddie's head. Suddenly he turned to face her, locking her gaze with his own. Involuntarily, Rachel flashed him a quick smile, but this time, he was the one who looked away.

**Rachel**

During the course of the journey, they somehow progressed from Rachel ignoring Eddie to Eddie ignoring Rachel as well. At the expedition start point they studiously avoided looking at each other or talking directly to each other. Rachel tried to pretend that his indifference didn't bother her, but the reality was very different. Every time he turned away from her, she felt as though someone had stabbed her in the heart. She wondered if Eddie felt it too, but his face was unreadable.

Rachel was in charge of assigning people to different checkpoints on the route which the students were meant to follow and she made a point of pairing Eddie off with Matt and placing him at the first checkpoint, while she placed herself and Steph at the last checkpoint. The emotional gulf between them currently felt so huge that adding a physical gulf seemed fitting somehow.

After an hour of sitting on top of a hill, in the rain, with only Steph for company, Rachel began to regret her choice of partner and checkpoint. It would be a while before any of the students got to them. Steph was also edgy around her - they'd never been the best of friends - but nevertheless, Steph was trying to fill the silence with an endless stream of gossip about, bizarrely enough, Flick Mellor's love life. Rachel tried to shut her voice out as she'd done with Jasmine's earlier, but Steph was harder to ignore.

'Personally, I think Marley should just go for it. I mean, Flick's gorgeous...'

At Steph's words, Rachel's hand involuntarily moved towards the top of her scar, but she caught herself before the action became obvious. No one would ever call her gorgeous again..

The day passed slowly. Eventually Steph gave up trying to engage Rachel in conversation and started doing word searches to entertain her. Rachel, for her part, tried very hard not to think of Eddie. She was disappointed in her own lack of self-control. Gradually, the students started to drift through the checkpoint looking tired and hungry. Surprisingly, none of them seemed to have slipped away...yet. Finally, Tom and Davina, who had been given the job of walking behind the kids, came into view. That morning, they had been holding hands and laughing, but now they looked dejected and a little fed up with each other. Once they'd left, Rachel slipped back into her thoughts, but was startled by Steph's voice beside her.

'Lovers' tiff, methinks.'

'What? No! Eddie's just in a weird mood today and so am I.' There was an uncomfortable pause as Rachel realized what she'd just said and Steph started to grin uncontrollably as she picked up the scent of fresh gossip.

'I was talking about Tom and Davina, but maybe I should have been talking about you and Eddie...'

'No, No! There is no me and Eddie...I was...I was just...confused...' Rachel's embarrassed explanation trailed off. 'We should...head back to the campsite...' she finished lamely.

Steph only grinned more widely in response.

**Eddie**

Eddie had a plan. He wasn't sure if it was a good plan, but at least it was a plan. He had decided to blank Rachel in the same way that she was blanking him. He hoped that, if she had any feelings for him at all, she would be forced to admit them to herself when she realized that she didn't like being ignored by him. Of course, if Rachel didn't return his feelings then the plan was only likely to push her further away, but Eddie tried not to dwell on this too much.

Rachel not feeling the same way seemed to be becoming a distinct possibility though. Aside from an all-too-brief smile on the coach, she'd been blanking him all day and deliberately assigning he to the checkpoint furthest from her had been a hurtful thing to do. At some point during the course of an afternoon spent sitting on a windswept hilltop getting steadily colder and wetter, Eddie's heart had hardened, his feigned annoyance turning to real annoyance until he was irrationally angry with Rachel. Or perhaps he was angry with himself for letting her hurt him in this way. He was too cold and wet to tell. Or care.

That evening, at the campsite, Eddie busied himself by checking up on the students, confiscating ridiculous amounts of alcohol and a worrying number of fireworks and then cooking dinner for all the staff. The only time he saw Rachel was for a brief moment as he handed her a plate of salad. She kept her head down, so he couldn't see her face, but their fingers touched as she took the plate from him. Her sharp intake of breath was mirrored by his own as a jolt of electricity shot through him at their touch. He hastily withdrew his hand, his own reaction only serving to increase his anger at her, at himself, at the world.

He spent the rest of the evening stomping around the campsite, yelling at pupils for any minor indiscretion and studiously avoiding Rachel. His mood was not improved by the fact that he was sharing a tent with Grantly, who snored incessantly, or the fact that Rachel's tent was pitched so close to his that he could hear her turn over in her sleep through the thin canvas walls. He turned his back on Grantly's sleeping form to face the side of the tent nearest to where Rachel was. of its own volition, his hand stretched out in her direction as if wanting to reach through the canvas and gently stroke her hair. A large part of him was still angry with her, but a small part which was getting louder every second couldn't help wishing that he was sharing a tent with Rachel and not his current, snoring companion.

**Rachel**

Rachel didn't wake up in a good mood. She was ridiculously cold, her hair was wet from water which had been leaking into her tent all night and a large stone was digging into her side which she was sure would result in an ugly and painful bruise.

The day went from bad to worse. The weather was terrible; the rain turned to sleet and beat relentlessly against her face as she waited at her checkpoint and a dense fog was closing in. The students trudged past dejectedly, all of them starting to regret the decision to avoid lessons by coming on a camping trip. Steph was thoroughly miserable as well and lacked even the energy to question Rachel about Eddie.

Then, as the day was drawing to a close, Rachel got a slightly frantic phone call from Tom who'd just met up with one of the groups of students and realized that Danielle Harker and Aleesha Dillon had gone missing from their group. Immediately, Rachel's mind went into overdrive as she imagined the girls lying unconscious at the bottom of a cliff or stumbling blindly around in the fog. She instructed one person at each checkpoint to start searching for the missing girls while the other person stayed where they were in case Aleesha and Danielle found their way back to the route they were meant to be following. Rachel wanted to join the search herself, but didn't really trust Steph to remain at the checkpoint and not wander off, so it was Steph who went out to search. Steph being Steph had no phone credit and had managed to lose her map, meaning that she had to take Rachel's phone and map with her.

Once Steph had gone, Rachel waited with nothing to do but listen to the sound of the rain falling around her. She was tired, having got little sleep the night before, perhaps because of lying on herd, stony ground or perhaps because she couldn't stop thinking about Eddie lying only a metre away from her. At one point, she was certain that she heard him murmur her name under his breath, but perhaps that was only wishful thinking on her part. Rachel felt herself slipping into a state of semi-consciousness halfway between sleeping and waking, where sounds took on a strange, muffled quality and sight became blurred and unclear. She tried desperately to claw her way back to wakefulness, but eventually she was claimed by the oblivion of deep sleep.

Rachel opened her eyes. Fuzzy shapes hovered on the edge of sight. The fog had closed in around her while she slept and now she could barely make out the figure sitting on a nearby rock. She felt a sharp pang of relief and something else she didn't want to name as she realized that the figure was Eddie. He turned towards her, having heard her stirring.

'You're awake,' he said, stating the obvious. 'I didn't want to wake you before, you looked so peaceful.'

She smiled at him and he smiled back. For a second the old closeness was there.

'Any news on Danielle and Aleesha?' Rachel asked after a moment.

'I just got a text from Davina. They're fine. Apparently, they got fed up of cooking on a camping stove, so they got a bus into a village near here so they could buy lunch. Didn't think of telling any of their group of course. Anyway, they've made it back to the campsite now.'

'I'm glad they're safe, but they'll still be in detention for a long time when we get back.'  
>Eddie laughed softly, a sound which thrilled Rachel. She was suddenly all too aware that they were alone in the middle of nowhere, with no possibility of anyone interrupting them. Eddie seemed to have realized it too - he was looking at her intensely, his eyes travelling over face and Rachel found her own gaze being drawn to his lips. A clap of thunder sounded overhead and Rachel jumped a little in shock, suddenly aware of the rest of the world again. The silence between them became awkward.<p>

'I guess we should try and find the others,' Eddie said at last.

Rachel nodded her agreement and gathered up her belongings before following him into the fog.

**Rachel**

Rachel's feet hurt, her head ached and every muscle in her body was tensed with exhaustion. They'd been walking for hours, but the fog made navigating with Eddie's map almost impossible. Rachel had no idea where they were and she was pretty sure Eddie didn't either despite his protestations to the contrary. The awkwardness between them had melted away at some point during their endless trudge through the mist. She wasn't sure why - they hadn't spoken much, but maybe they were just too tired to carry on being distant with one another.

In front of her, Eddie stumbled as his foot disappeared down a rabbit hole. Rachel hurried forwards and pulled him to his feet. He smiled his thanks and went to carry on walking, but something in Rachel, the something which had been keeping her going, snapped. Exhaustion overwhelmed her and she sank to the ground, not caring about how wet and muddy the grass was.

'Rich?' Eddie's voice was full of genuine concern.

'I can't go any further.' He didn't disagree. The truth of her statement was obvious.

Instead, he sat down beside her. Their situation seemed hopeless; they were miles from anywhere, Steph had Rachel's phone and the battery on Eddie's phone had run out shortly after they'd started walking. Rachel looked so dejected, just sitting there, so different from her usual, animated self that Eddie's heart broke. He put his arm around her and, for once, it was purely Platonic. He was offering her comfort and nothing more. She sensed this and leaned into him, resting her head on his shoulder. She didn't know how long they sat like that, too tired to move or to speak.

After a while Eddie broke the silence. 'We have tents. We could set up camp here.'  
>Rachel nodded her agreement. There wasn't really any alternative.<p>

They began to unpack the tents, but half of Eddie's tent poles had disappeared. It was clearly someone's idea of a joke. They stared at the remains of the tent in disbelief.

'I guess I could try and make some tent poles out of wood...' Eddie's voice lacked conviction. It was obvious that he had no idea how to construct makeshift tent poles. Also, there was a distinct lack of wood in their general vicinity.

'Doesn't be stupid Eddie,' Rachel snapped. 'We'll have to share my tent.'

Eddie didn't reply and they put up Rachel's tent in silence, the barriers between them going back up as quickly as they had come down. Rachel was ashamed of herself for snapping - it wasn't fair of her to treat him like that. It was hardly his fault that someone had stolen his tent poles. It was just that the thought of sharing a tent with him made her incredibly nervous for reasons she couldn't quite explain.

**Rachel**

The tent was in front of them. It was up, their bags were inside and the door was open. Inside was an escape from the rain and the wind and the cold and the horrible fog and yet, neither of them made any move to enter the tent. Instead they stood, side-by-side, looking at it. Rachel's body language was defensive, her arms wrapped around her.

Eddie was more conscious of the non-verbal signals he was giving off and stood with his arms deliberately by his sides. Both of them made sure they weren't touching. Rachel stole a glance at Eddie's face and saw her own nervousness reflected there.

'Ladies first.' Eddie broke the silence, gesturing towards the tent.

Rachel shook her head. 'No, you first.' For some reason, she really didn't want to turn away from him, knowing that he was watching her crawl into a tent in a distinctly inelegant fashion. From Eddie's expression, he seemed to have similar reservations, but one of them had to go in first and, so he got down on his hands and knees are crawled through the opening. At any other time, Rachel would have found the sight funny, but now it only seemed to increase her nervousness. She followed Eddie in quickly, hoping that he wasn't picking up on her feelings. She followed a little too quickly in fact. Eddie hadn't quite managed to disentangle himself from the fabric of the tent and she tripped over him, sending them both sprawling onto the floor of the tent. Eddie righted himself first and pulled her up into a sitting position. Suddenly, Rachel found that her face was very close to his. His hand reached out and gently tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. 'You ok?' he asked softly.

She nodded and pulled away, the purely Platonic feelings of earlier quickly turning into something else entirely. Eddie sensed her confusion and knew better than to push her into anything she wasn't ready for.

'So, which side do you want?' he asked, gesturing to the tent.

'This one's fine.'

Rachel busied herself with unrolling her sleeping bag and, behind her, Eddie did the same. She slipped inside the sleeping bag, fully clothed. Eddie, meanwhile was sitting on top of his sleeping bag, looking as if he wanted to talk. Rachel knew exactly what he wanted to talk about and she wanted to talk too, but not here, not now. She simply didn't have the energy.

'Eddie, I'm really tired. I think I'll try and get some sleep now if that's ok,' she said quickly before he had the chance to start a conversation.

'Sure,' he sounded slightly deflated. 'Night, Rach.'

'Night.' Rachel quickly turned her back on him, not wanting to face the emotions written all over his face, and prepared herself for what was likely to be a long and entirely sleepless night.

**Eddie**

The night got colder. The rain drumming on the outside of the tent got harder. The wind got stronger. Eddie was shivering in his sleeping bag. A stone dug into his leg and the ground underneath him was sloping slightly so his head was below his feet. He couldn't sleep, couldn't even think straight because he was too aware of Rachel's intoxicating presence on the other side of the tent. Somehow it had been easier last night with the canvas walls between them. The Rachel in his head had been happy to share a tent with him. The real Rachel was far more complex. Of course he didn't want her to change; he loved everything about her, but, at the same time, he wished she'd talk to him a bit more and tell him what was going on inside that beautiful head of hers. He ached to touch her, but knew that that wouldn't do anything to bring her closer.

Eddie rolled over in the hope of avoiding the annoying stone digging in to him. Lying on his other side proved to be more painful as far as the stone was concerned, but he found himself unwilling to turn over again because, from this angle, he could see Rachel, or at least he could see the back of her head, but that was better than not seeing her at all. Eventually, somehow, he managed to fall into an uneasy, shallow sleep.

When Eddie awoke a short while later, the temperature had plummeted. He could hear Rachel shivering next to him. She was obviously awake, but Eddie wasn't sure if he should talk to her - she probably wouldn't like him to see her so cold and vulnerable. He lay there for a while, pretending to be asleep and listening to the sound of her shivering even more. Then the shivering started to be mingled with another, far worse sound; she was crying. Eddie couldn't pretend to ignore her any longer.

'Rachel, are you alright?'

There was a pause and then 'I'm fine.'

'No you're not.'

She didn't reply for a moment, but when she did, her voice was choked and ragged with emotions he'd never heard there before. 'I'm just so sorry, Eddie...'

'What for/'

'For kissing you like that and then just ignoring you, hurting you...'

Eddie decided that the time had come for honesty. 'You did heard me, Rach,' he heard her start to cry again. 'But I still love you...'

'Don't say that. I'm not worth it.'

'Rachel, you are. I want you to know that I'll always be here for you in whatever capacity you want me to be.'

'Thank you.' she said softly. Her sobs got quieter then, but when she next spoke her voice was still far from steady. 'At some point...in the future...I can see myself being ready, able, to be with you in the way you want me to be. I do love you, Eddie, really I do, it's just...I'm not ready...emotionally for this. I over-think things, it's a character flaw of mine, but it means that I have to think about this, us, before I can be with you and I don't know how long that'll take. If you can't wait for me, if you meet someone else then I'll understand.'

Eddie was stunned into silence by her words. All he could think was that she loved him, that there might be a chance for them. Nothing else mattered.

'Well say something.' Rachel sounded almost afraid.

'Rachel, I will wait for as long as you need me to. I want to do this when we're both ready. I love you too much to push you into anything.'

'Thank you, Eddie.' she whispered. She reached out then, gently stroking his cheek. Eddie trembled a little at her touch. Her hand was shaking too and was also ice cold.

'Rachel, you're freezing!' Eddie couldn't keep the concern out of his voice.

'It is a little chilly.' She tried to laugh, but teeth were chattering.

Without thinking, Eddie moved closer to her and wrapped his arms around her, cradling her against his chest.

'Eddie...' she started to protest.

'I can't just lie there and watch you shiver.'

She didn't argue further and soon, he felt her relax in his arms and nestle her head further into his chest. Slowly her shivers subsided. Eddie, for his part, didn't think he'd ever felt happier. He was lost, he was cold, he was wet, but the woman he loved was in his arms which more than made up for everything else. When he was sure Rachel was asleep, he gently kissed the top of her head, unable to stop the huge grin which was spreading across his face.

**Rachel**

Rachel didn't open her eyes as soon as she woke up. Instead, she lay where she was for a moment, savouring the delicious sensation of warmth which was permeating her body. She had the strange sensation that she was exactly where she was meant to be, where she should have been her whole life. She felt safe and it wasn't feeling she was used to. Up until this point she'd always felt as if she was just an annoyance who everyone would be better off without. Her parents had always preferred perfect Melissa and her previous lovers had never seemed to care about her or her feelings. None of them had ever held her while she slept.

Finally, she opened her eyes and gazed up into Eddie's sleeping face. She couldn't believe that she was really here, with him. She blinked a few times to convince herself that this was real. Then, Eddie snored slightly, just once, and Rachel was finally convinced of the reality of the situation. She reached up and stroked his cheek until his eyes fluttered open.

'Rachel.' he breathed, gazing down at her, wonder in his tone.

'Hi,' She smiled. In response, Eddie's arms tightened around her, drawing her closer.

Rachel didn't resist. Neither of them wanted to move. They were caught up in a perfect cocoon of love and warmth. Eventually though, they surrendered to the inevitable and got up, mainly because the tent, which had been so cold during the night, was now becoming unbearably stuffy as the sun climbed higher in the sky.

They packed up and breakfasted on what little food they happened to have with them. The weather was still horrible, but the fog had cleared and Rachel was finally able to work out where they were on the map. All the time, both of them just couldn't seem to stop smiling.

They set off, walking beside each other, through the grass and bracken, all of the awkwardness of yesterday had melted away. Their conversation was easy and carefree and Rachel was starting to think that she might actually enjoy camping if she had Eddie for company. At one point, Rachel slipped and Eddie grabbed her hand to steady her. After she had righted herself, he kept hold of her hand, lacing his fingers with hers. Rachel didn't pull away; she simply allowed herself to enjoy this simple and gentle touch. They walked, hand-in-hand all the way back to the campsite.

They dropped hands as the maroon Waterloo Road minibus came into view over the hilltop, mutually agreeing that having spent a night alone together would already have given everyone enough to gossip about without arriving hand in hand as well.

'Once more unto the breach...' Eddie murmured as they entered the campsite.. It took every ounce of willpower and self-control which Rachel possessed to keep herself from reaching out to take his hand again.

People were rushing from the campsite to greet them - their unexplained absence had kept a lot of people awake last night and Danielle and Aleesha were feeling very guilty about the whole thing. It was Danielle who reached them first.

'Sir, Miss, me and Aleesha are sooooo sorry...'

'It's ok, Danielle. We'll talk about it back at school.' Rachel was touched by the girl's obvious distress, but still determined that she and Aleesha should have to face the consequences of their actions.

By the time Eddie and Rachel had reassured everyone that they were fine, found Eddie's tent poles in Michaela's bag and had had something to eat, night was drawing in. Rachel was incredibly tired, but she realized that she'd enjoyed the day immensely. Ever since they had arrived back at the campsite, Eddie had been a constant warm, comforting presence beside and, every so often, she would catch a glimpse of that particular smile which, she was starting to realize, he saved only for her.

That night Rachel's tent felt empty without him. She lay on her back, thinking about Eddie and wishing he would come to her. She wasn't particularly surprised when he poked his head through the door of the tent.

'Just thought I'd come and check you weren't cold,' he grinned cheekily.

Rachel laughed 'I'm freezing if you must know.'

'Can I stay then?'

Rachel's heart leapt. She wanted him to stay more than anything and yet...and yet...  
>'Won't Grantly wonder where you are?' she asked, referring to the fact that Eddie and Grantly were meant to be sharing a tent.<p>

'He's asleep already and tomorrow I'll just tell him I got up early.'

Rachel knew that she should tell him to go, that it was inappropriate for him to stay when she was insisting on keeping their relationship as Platonic as possible, but he mind no longer seemed to be in control of her tongue. 'Then I's like you to stay,' she said too quickly for the rational part of herself to protest.

Without hesitation, and looking very surprised, Eddie climbed into her sleeping bag and took her in his arms. She relaxed against, all doubts vanishing from her mind. Rachel wasn't sure if they were just friends or if they had become something more, but, for once, she didn't think about it too much and realized that she simply liked what they had. Whatever that was.

**Eddie**

Eddie was filled with a sense of wonder. That first morning in the tent, he couldn't believe that Rachel was really here, in his arms. He'd looked down into her perfect face and she'd smiled up at him, her eyes full of love. Eddie was amazed when she let him reach down and touch her hair. It was such a simple thing to do, such an easy thing, but, for him, it was the greatest and best type of freedom he'd ever enjoyed. She'd said she loved him. His universe had shattered and then re-formed itself into something brighter, bigger, better at her words. When he held her, she fit against him perfectly as if they were two pieces of a puzzle which had always been intended to fit together like that. When she'd spoken to him, her head resting on his chest, he'd been thrilled to hear her voice so close to him that he could feel the vibrations across his chest. It was the most beautiful sound he'd ever heard. He ached to kiss her, be with her, but, at the same time, holding her like this was more than he'd ever dreamed she'd let him do.  
>When she got up, her absence was like a physical pain, but, throughout the day, he enjoyed a secret communion with her. Every smile, every whisper, every half-glance which passed between them promised something more, something better. He loved the excitement of having to hide his looks and whispers from those around them. It lent their affair, which wasn't yet quite an affair, a decadent, mesmerizing glamour, a delicate veil of deception and mystery and drama. Most of all though, he loved those few moments snatched with her away from the others. Then he was permitted to take her hand and let his eyes feast on her without fear of censure or reproach and, more than anything, he loved those times when she would smile back and the universe would re-arrange itself and shift ninety degrees to the left and everything would make sense. He was amazed at the hold she had over him and he loved her all the more for it.<p>

That second night, he'd gone to her tent on impulse because he couldn't resist seeing her again. He'd been expecting her to turn him away, he would have understood if she had, but she didn't. She welcomed him in and settled herself easily in his arms and, once more, he felt he was complete. He suddenly knew that if he could hold Rachel in his arms every night then his life would be a happy one.

**Jasmine, Matt and Steph**

Part Thirteen

On the coach back to school notes were being passed. By the teachers. The kids were texting. The notes and the texts though were all about the same thing. Janeece's phone flashed as she got a message from Bolton:  
>'fink Mason and Lawson r gettin it on?'<p>

Danielle texted Aleesha:  
>'wat's up wid Mason?'<p>

Steph passed a note to Matt who was sat behind her:  
>'Is it me, or does Rachel look unusually happy today?'<p>

Matt was quick to write back:  
>'Maybe something happened on the moors when they got lost...'<p>

Jasmine, who was sitting next to Matt and reading the notes as well, tapped Steph on the shoulder. 'I think I saw Eddie coming out of Rachel's tent this morning.'

'WHAT?" Steph's exclamation drew a few confused stares and the three teachers leaned closer together to try and keep their conversation private.

'Steph, not so loud!' Matt placed a restraining hand on her arm. 'We don't want everyone to hear. That's why we were passing notes instead of talking.'

'They won't hear.' Steph was too excited for note passing now. 'So, did he look happy when you saw him?' she asked Jasmine.

'He did, but he also looked a bit...confused.'

'I think we may have a case on unrequited love on our hands...'

'Steph, he was in her tent,' Matt interjected. 'That's hardly unrequited.'

'Look at their body language though,' said Steph knowingly.

Jasmine and Matt looked. As far as they could see, Eddie and Rachel just looked like any two people having a conversation even if their heads were a little closer together than usual and their smiles a little broader.

'They're just talking,' Jasmine said finally.

'Exactly,' Steph looked pleased.

'I don't understand. What's so enlightening about them just talking? We're just talking.'

'Trust me Matt,' Steph replied. 'I'm an expert when it comes to matters of the heart.'

Matt and Jasmine looked sceptical, but Steph carried on regardless. 'They're not touching at all - if they had just got together they would be, so they're not together yet, but they want to be.'

'They're perfect for each other though.' This was from Jasmine.

'I know,' Steph said. 'That's why it's up to us to get them together...'

At the front of the coach, Eddie and Rachel were completely wrapped up in each other, oblivious to the world and to the plotting of those behind them. They were talking quietly about anything and everything, but they weren't really interested in the conversation. Instead, they each concentrated on the proximity of the other and the knowledge that only a millimetre was between them. As the coach pulled up outside the school, Rachel let her hand brush his as she asked 'Will you come over for dinner tonight?'

**Rachel**

Rachel was amused and ashamed in equal measure by her own childishness. She stood in her underwear in front of the full length mirror in her bedroom. Just about every item of clothing she owned was strewn across the floor and around her feet.

'Rach, are you ready yet?' Philip's voice called from downstairs. Rachel had subtly tried her best to persuade him to go out tonight, but he had stubbornly refused to take the hint, not realizing that something, and she wasn't sure what, had changed between her and Eddie.

'Not yet!' she called back.

'But I don't know what to do with this lasagne!' She'd left him in charge of the cooking while she showered and dressed.

'Improvise,' was her perhaps unwise reply. She had no idea how good Philip was at cooking, but she suspected that he hadn't had much practice.

Rachel turned her attention back to the clothes on the floor. She had really didn't have a clue what to wear - she didn't know if this was a date or just a friendly dinner. She also didn't know why she had even invited him over in the first place. She wanted to see him desperately, wanted never to be apart from him, but, at the same time, she wasn't ready to take their relationship any further yet and suspected that inviting him back to her house for a potentially romantic dinner might perhaps be sending out the wrong sort of signals.

She heard a car crunch across the gravel of the driveway followed by Philip's voice 'Rach, he's here!'

In a panic, Rachel threw on the first dress she picked up without really looking at it, ran a brush through her hair and shoved the rest on her clothes into the bottom of her wardrobe in case Eddie came up later...Rachel quickly stopped that particular train of thought before it could go any further. There was no reason to suppose that Eddie would be coming upstairs.  
>She heard Philip letting Eddie in and hastily ran down the stairs to greet him. She was met with wide-eyed stares from both Philip and Eddie.<p>

'Wow, Rachel,' Eddie stammered at last 'you look stunning.'

Rachel blushed as she caught sight of herself in the hall mirror. She suspected that the skin-tight dress she had hastily grabbed from the pile on the floor was most definitely sending out the wrong signals as well as being far, far too formal for a casual dinner with friends. It was about right for a first date though.

Rachel was amused, flattered and embarrassed by the way Eddie was staring at her. The dress she was wearing was tight, low cut and not particularly long. It would have been perfect for an exclusive cocktail party. Philip had blushed bright red and was making very sure that his eyes never strayed from either her face or the floor. Mostly, he ended up staring at the floor; it was the safest option. After a loaded pause, Eddie shoved a bottle of wine and a bunch of flowers at Rachel who was touched by his thoughtfulness. Philip looked a little surprised at Eddie's gifts, perhaps starting to suspect that there was something more intimate than friendship in the relationship between his aunt and his maths teacher. Rachel sent him into the kitchen to check on the lasagne, leaving her alone with Eddie.

'You really do look lovely,' he said, placing his hands on her arms and drawing her a little closer.

There was a slightly embarrassed cough from the kitchen door. 'I think the lasagne's done.' Philip's eyes were travelling back and forth between Rachel and Eddie.

The two of them sprang apart like embarrassed teenagers and Rachel ran a hand through her hair a little self-consciously as they followed Philip into the dining room. Rachel was surprised at her own reaction to Philip's sudden appearance - it wasn't as if he had been interrupting anything. She and Eddie were just friends after all. Maybe she'd sprung back because she'd been wishing on some level that he had been interrupting something, even though she knew that she wasn't ready for anything more...yet...

The lasagne was edible, but slightly overdone and Rachel resolved not to put Philip in charge of cooking the next time Eddie came over; there was no doubt in her mind that there would be a next time, many more next times in fact. The slightly rubbery lasagne though didn't stop the meal from being one of the best Rachel had had in years. She would happily eat rubbery lasagne every day if she could eat it while Eddie was sat opposite her. She felt a thrill every time his foot accidently brushed hers under the table. This happened so regularly that she was starting to think that it wasn't accidental at all. Her fingertips brushed his as he passed her the bottle of wine and then again as they both reached out to steady her glass while she poured the wine.

After dinner, they stayed in the dining room, talking. Rachel secretly hoped that Philip would get bored and leave, but he didn't. The teenager seemed to genuinely like Eddie which Rachel supposed she should probably be grateful for. Eventually, Philip announced that he was going to go and do his homework, a suggestion which Eddie and Rachel were both very enthusiastic about. However, their enthusiasm was short-lived. Philip left them alone for all of five minutes before returning to ask for Eddie's help with his maths. Eddie, of course, couldn't refuse. Rachel sighed in frustration, but decided that she might as well make the best of the situation. She got out some paperwork and sat down at the table with them, finding that even being in the same room as him without talking or communicating was enough to make her feel wonderfully safe and secure.

**Eddie**

After what seemed like an eternity, Philip finally finished his homework and went to bed. Eddie and Rachel were alone and suddenly neither of them was quite sure what to do. On the camping trip they'd been in a new situation where new rules could be created. They'd been somehow outside of their normal world, everything had been freer, more casual. Now though, they had come back to reality and they weren't sure where they stood - was this a date or not? Should Eddie stay or should he go? He wanted more than anything to stay, but he also didn't know what Rachel wanted and he decided that it was best to opt for a course of action which wouldn't push her further from him.

'I should go,' he said, starting to gather up his coat and bag.

Disappointment flickered across Rachel's face.

'Unless you'd like me to stay?' he asked, hardly daring to hope.

'I'd like you to stay.'

Eddie's heart leapt and a grin spread across his face which was mirrored by Rachel's own expression. 'Then I'll stay,' he said.

'Great,' Rachel picked up the wine from the table. 'Shall we head into the living room?'  
>He nodded and followed her down the corridor.<p>

In the living room, Rachel settled herself on the sofa while Eddie looked around, unsure of where to sit. He wanted to join her on the sofa, but didn't want to make her uncomfortable. She solved the problem for him by indicating the space next to her on the sofa. He sat down gladly while she poured him a glass of wine. Despite having spent all day together, Eddie was glad to find that they still had plenty to talk about. He loved to hear her speak - she was so passionate about everything, so expressive. At times, he was so busy listening to the sound of her voice that he almost forgot to listen to the words. After a while, Rachel leaned back against her side of the sofa and stretched out her legs, resting her feet on Eddie's leg. The movement was so casual, so natural that he almost didn't notice it. He was amazed that she was being so free with him. He placed his hand on her leg, gently stroking the skin with his fingers. It was like silk to the touch.  
>Soon though, Rachel pulled her legs away and sat up, leaving Eddie cold with dread that he'd gone too far, overstepped some invisible boundary. He was just about to apologize when he realized that she'd only moved to pour herself another glass of wine. Relief flooded through him, but relief was replaced with something else entirely when she returned to the sofa and lay the other way around so that now her head, not her feet, was resting on him. He stroked her hair absent-mindedly, wondering if he should kiss her. The wine was clouding his senses, making him dizzy, eating away at his control. The dress she'd worn tonight had been deliberately provocative and now, she was most definitely flirting. Perhaps she wanted him to kiss her, but, then again, perhaps she didn't...<p>

They talked for hours, wrapped up in each other, in the world they had created for themselves. In time though, the wine bottle was empty and tiredness was overcoming them. Rachel finally stood up to signal the end of the evening, but the wine made her uncoordinated and she stumbled into the table, causing the wine bottle to fall to the floor. It didn't break. She and Eddie both crouched down to pick it up and, all of a sudden, their faces were mere centimetres apart. On impulse, Eddie cupped Rachel's chin in his hand and looked into her face. Her scent was intoxicating; her lips were dark red and full and stained with the wine. He saw desire in her eyes. He leaned in and kissed her softly, gently and, for a moment, she kissed him back. Then, with a low moan, she tore her lips from his and turned her face away. Eddie's world crashed around him. He'd gone too far. She'd turned away.

'I think you should go now.' she said quietly ad every word stabbed him through the heart.

He picked up his coat and walked to the door, filled with shame at having mis-read her so badly.

'Eddie, wait.' he stopped at the sound of her voice. 'You can't drive home after all that wine. There's a spare room - straight up the stairs, first door on the left.'

'Thanks, Rachel.' he muttered. He knew he should leave, that she didn't want him to stay, but he couldn't leave; just being under the same roof as her was a million times better than not being near her at all.

**Eddie**

Eddie lay in bed, wondering what he had done wrong. There were some things about Rachel which he would never understand. Her eyes had been filled with a longing, a yearning which he was certain he hadn't imagined and, when they'd kissed, there had been a moment before she pulled away when she'd kissed him with an eagerness, a desperation, a hunger which mirrored his own. And yet, she had pulled away. Eddie realized that this relationship, if it was a relationship, was going to have to be entirely on Rachel's terms. One more error in judgement on his part could push her away entirely.  
>He slowly became aware of a dreadful moaning sound coming from Rachel's room. She was crying with fierce, hysterical sobs which she was clearly trying her best to control. The sound wrenched at Eddie's heart, at the very core of his being. He wanted to go next door, to comfort her, but instead, her lay, frozen and pinned to the bed by a fear he couldn't describe. He couldn't stand to see her turn away from him or worse, tell him to leave. He was ashamed of his own weakness, but he couldn't go to her. Someone else could though, someone braver than him. He heard Philip coming out of his room, going into Rachel's room, asking if she was alright and then being sent away by her, not unkindly, but firmly. Suddenly, Eddie regained his courage - it wasn't right than an insecure, damaged, motherless boy like Philip should be able to face her when Eddie couldn't.<p>

As soon as he had satisfied himself that Philip was back in his room, Eddie took a deep breath and walked to Rachel's room himself. His hand trembled as he reached out to open the door. She was sitting on the floor by her bed, her legs drawn up to her chest, her arms wrapped around her legs. Her head rested on her knees and she was rocking back and forth, back and forth, sobbing to herself.

Eddie closed the door, but didn't come any closer, not wanting to scare her. 'Rachel...' he said quietly.

He was expecting her to shout, perhaps throw something at him, but she didn't. She only looked up at him for a second, her eyes liquid pools of despair, before returning her head to her knees.

'Rachel,' he whispered again.

She didn't raise her head and, when she spoke, her words were so soft he almost didn't hear them 'I'm sorry...'

'Sorry? Why? It's me who should be sorry.'

She shook her head, her sobs intensifying and he could no longer stand the distance between them. He crossed the room to where she was and sat beside her, drawing her into his arms. She didn't resist, but asked, puzzled 'Why do you still want to touch me? I pushed you away.'

'Rachel,' he whispered, holding her chin so he could look into her eyes 'You have every right to push me away if I do something you're not comfortable with. I wanted you to kiss me, but, if you can't, for whatever reason, then that's fine. It doesn't change the way I feel about you.'

In response, she buried her head in his chest and he held her until her sobs subsided.  
>'Why did you pull away? I'd just like to understand.' he said gently when she was quiet.<p>

'I wanted to kiss you,' was the reply. 'I just...can't.'

'Why not?'

She was silent for a moment and then, reaching up and running the finger of one hand through his hair, she said apologetically 'I don't know how to explain it, but one day, when I work out how, I will explain it. You deserve to understand.'

Eddie knew not to question her further. Instead, he took her hand and lightly kissed her fingertips. 'We should try and get some sleep before work,' he murmured.

She nodded and allowed him to lead her to her bed. He turned, as if to go, but Rachel took hold of his hand and drew him back.

'Stay.' she whispered.

He didn't protest and slid under the covers with her, taking her in his arms and gently stroking her hair until she fell asleep.

**Rachel**

Rachel woke before the alarm went off. Eddie lay behind her, pressed up against her back with one arm wrapped around her. Their legs were tangled together and his face was pressed into her shoulder. For a moment, Rachel felt content, at peace, and then the miserable end to the night before brought her crashing back down to Earth. She wrapped her fingers around Eddie, holding his hand as tightly as she could. She was filled with a cold, throat-constricting fear at the thought of losing him, but she knew she was pushing him away. Why couldn't she just let him do what he wanted to do? She'd done it so many times before - she should be used to it by now, but she didn't want this to be like those other times. Tears began to roll down her face as she imagined a life without him. She turned over in his arms and pushed her face into his chest, trying to reassure herself that he was still there for her.

'Rach...' he murmured sleepily, instinctively drawing her closer, wrapping his arms more tightly around her.

'Promise you won't ever leave me, Eddie,' she whispered through her tears.

'Course I won't. Don't be silly.' He mumbled, still more asleep than awake. He kissed the top of her head and then closed his eyes again. 'Can I go back to sleep now?' Eddie wasn't really a morning person.

Rachel laughed a little at that. Her tears had stopped, but she was still feeling anxious and upset, her emotions strange and contradictory. She nestled into him and herself in his presence until the alarm finally woke him up. He smiled down at her, looking a little confused at her tear-stained face. He evidently had no memory of their earlier conversation.

Before Rachel had a chance to say anything, there was a knock on the bedroom door.

'Rach, can I come in?' It was Philip.

Rachel and Eddie froze in each other's arms.

'Just a second! Rachel called back, trying to make her voice as steady as possible.

'Does he know I stayed over?' whispered Eddie.

Rachel shook her head. 'And he can't find out unless we want the whole school knowing by break.'

'Rachel?' Philip sounded concerned.

'I'm coming, Philip!' Rachel turned back to Eddie. 'What are we going to do?'

'Rach, I'm worried about you.' To their horror, Philip had started to open the door.

Panicked, Eddie leapt from the bed, looking around for somewhere to hide.

'The wardrobe.' Rachel hissed and Eddie disappeared inside just as Philip came in.

'Are you alright?' he asked.

'I'm fine,' Rachel replied, but Philip didn't look like he believed her and it took several minutes for Rachel to convince him and persuade him that he should go and get ready for school. When he'd gone, Eddie came out of the wardrobe, looking slightly stressed at having had to hide in the first place. Before she could stop herself, Rachel had collapsed into a fit of giggles at the absurdness of the situation and soon, Eddie succumbed to laughter as well. Rachel had forgotten how good it felt to laugh like that and she was still laughing as she quickly bundled him out of the back door before Philip saw them. Eddie was going to get the bus to work as possibly already seen his car still in the driveway and would be suspicious if it suddenly vanished. Rachel felt a little guilty about shoving him unceremoniously out into the cold to get the bus with all the students, but she was also secretly very, very pleased that he'd have to come back with her tonight to fetch his car.

**Eddie**

Eddie was on the bus. He hadn't on a bus in years and he was starting to remember why - it was crowded and noisy and there was nowhere to sit. It was also full of Waterloo Road pupils who were giving him decidedly confused glances. He had been apart from Rachel for all of ten minutes and already he missed her desperately. He tried to block out the cacophony of noise around him by picturing her face, her eyes, the way she'd looked as she lay in his arms, but he couldn't help also remembering the way she'd looked last night as she sat hunched on her bedroom floor with tears running down her beautiful face. He wished he could find a way to make her happy, but he couldn't do that until he worked out why she was so upset.

'Mason kicked you out has she?' Eddie was startled out of his reverie by Janeece's matter-of-fact question as she got on the bus.

'No Janeece,' He paused, trying to think of a plausible excuse for his lack of a car.  
>'Why're you on the bus then?'<p>

'My car's at the garage.' It was the best reason he could think of off the top of his head. Janeece looked sceptical.

'Surprised Mason didn't give you a lift then, Sir.' Janeece was definitely turning into a mini version of Steph with her endless pursuit of gossip.

'I haven't seen Miss Mason this morning, Janeece.'

'Course not, Sir.' Janeece flashed him a knowing smile as she pushed her way to the back of the bus.

Eddie sighed. He'd just failed miserably at keeping a non-relationship a secret. How would he cope if it ever turned into a relationship? His mind drifted back to Rachel and her tear-stained face. He had to get her to talk to him somehow. He had to find a way to be alone with her, completely alone without Philip in the next room or Steph spying on them from down the corridor. A plan began to form in Eddie's mind. he could convince her that there was a governor's meeting that evening in the school hall and then meet her there along with some kind of portable candlelit dinner for two...Admittedly, the details of the plan needed work and the school hall was hardly the most romantic of settings, but at least, after everyone had gone home for the evening, they would be free of disturbances.

Eddie was brought back to reality suddenly by the sound of his phone ringing. He pulled it from his pocket, hoping it was Rachel even thought she had no reason to phone him as he'd seen her ten minutes ago and he fully intended to go and find her the second he got to school. It wasn't Rachel though. To his surprise, it was Alison, his ex-wife. He answered a little hesitantly, wondering if he'd forgotten to meet Michael or done something equally unforgivable. It turned out that Alison was the one who'd forgotten something, namely the fact that she was going on a business trip for a couple of days which she couldn't get out of and she needed him to look after Michael. Starting today. Eddie couldn't refuse. He didn't relish the thought of taking a three year-old to work with him, but he did love spending time with his son. It was only after he hung up that he realized his hopes of being alone with Rachel had been entirely dashed for the next few days.

**Jasmine**

Jasmine had spent the evening in the pub with Matt and Steph trying to work out how to get Eddie and Rachel together. Steph had approached the whole thing with militaristic precision. At one point she'd even produced a map of the school from her handbag and spread it out on the table so she could point out various supply cupboards in an authoritative manner. Jasmine couldn't help wondering why exactly Steph was so familiar with the school supply cupboards in the first place...Matt had been just as bad - he'd picked up the salt cellar and an empty glass from the table and put them on Steph's map to represent Eddie and Rachel. Jasmine couldn't help being a little impressed; Steph and Matt had clearly missed their callings. They would have made excellent, if slightly scary, generals. Their enthusiasm was starting to rub off on Jasmine too. She'd gone along to stop them getting too carried away, secretly believing that Eddie and Rachel was perfectly capable of sorting out their own love lives, but, by the end of the evening, she was starting to believe that the future of life, the universe and everything depended on getting the headmistress and her deputy together as quickly as was humanly possible.

They'd discussed and rejected every plan they could think of. Matt had wanted to just lock them in the costume store under the stage until they admitted their feelings for one another. Rachel had completely the wrong type of personality for this to work though - she'd never give up on trying escaping and was likely to focus entirely on smashing the door down, rather than engaging in a deep philosophical examination of her feelings for Eddie. Steph had suggested that they should try and make Rachel jealous by getting Jasmine to flirt with Eddie. Jasmine wasn't too keen on this plan and also, seeing Eddie with Melissa hadn't made Rachel admit her feelings, so, seeing Eddie with Jasmine wasn't likely to either. Steph's next suggestion of getting Grantly to flirt with Rachel was just met with stunned silence. Grantly never flirted with anyone and he didn't even like Rachel. Jasmines own suggestion had been to invite Rachel and Eddie to a staff meal and then ensure that no one else turned up. However, as Eddie and Rachel had been alone in a tent for a night without anything happening, they were unlikely to admit their feelings for each other after having been alone in a restaurant for a couple of hours.

Jasmine's new plan came to her that morning while she was teaching her year 12 class about 'Much Ado About Nothing', a play in which most of the characters come up with a plan to get two other characters together. The plan was simple and timeless and it might just work on Eddie and Rachel.

**Rachel**

Rachel stared at her mountain of paperwork, not really concentrating on any of it. She played with her pen, turning it over and over in her fingers. Where was Eddie? She'd thought that he would come and see her at some point during first period as he was free then, but he hadn't. Now, it was nearing the end of break and still no Eddie. She knew she was being ridiculous and he was probably just swamped with marking, but she couldn't help wondering if she'd pushed him away once too often. Of their own volition, her hands found their way to the neck of her shirt. She pulled it down a little to reveal the top of her scar and ran her fingers over the cracked, damaged skin. No wonder he hadn't come to see her.

There was a knock on the doorframe of her office and Rachel jumped a little, embarrassed at having been caught examining her scar. Eddie was stood there with, to her surprise, Michael in his arms.

'I can explain,' he said and told her about Alison's business trip. 'Thing is, Rach,' he finished. 'I'm teaching next period and I can't take him with me...' he left the sentence hanging in the air, no doubt hoping that she'd volunteer as a babysitter, so he didn't have to ask outright.

'Can't you take him to the crèche?' she suggested.

'They're full up. They can't take any more without breaching health and safety rules.' he paused, again waiting for her to speak. When she didn't, he continued 'Rach, I know you're busy and it's a lot to ask, but you wouldn't look after him for a bit would you?'

Rachel looked doubtful. 'I'm a bit useless with little children,' she admitted. 'I'm sure Jasmine or someone would do a better job.'

'I'd prefer to leave him with you.'

His trust in her was touching and left Rachel with little choice but to hold out her arms for the child.

'Rachel, you're amazing!' Eddie deposited Michael into her lap and hurries out of the office before she could change her mind.

Rachel eyes Michael warily. She considered leaving him with her secretary for an hour, but decided that that wouldn't be fair on either Eddie or the secretary.  
>'Hello Michael.' She said, making an effort to smile and look as friendly as was humanly possible. 'I'm Rachel.'<p>

Michael remained silent and sat stiffly on her lap, regarding her as warily as she was regarding him.

'I'm a friend of your Daddy's.' She said, trying to elict some response.

The boy still didn't speak, but started solemnly sucking his thumb instead. For some reason, this made him look strangely like Eddie. Rachel looked around her desperately for something to entertain him - her office hadn't really been designed to entertain children; she could hardly offer him a cup of tea.

'Would you like a biscuit?' she said at last.

He nodded, still too shy to speak, but at least nodding was a step towards communication. Rachel handed him a biscuit from the packet on her desk and was rewarded with a smile as he took it. It seemed that bribery was clearly the way forward. Michael settled himself more comfortably in her lap and started looking around her office, his eyes eventually resting on the cactus on her windowsill.

'You have a pretty tree.' He declared.

Rachel smiled. At least they now appeared to be on speaking terms, but she somehow doubted that a cactus was going to keep him entertained for the next hour, no matter how pretty it was.

**Eddie**

Sounds of laughter were drifting out from Rachel's office. Eddie paused outside to listen, a smile tugging the corners of his lips. Michael's laugh was a high-pitched squeal of excitement. Rachel's was beautiful and musical and more mature, but just as excited. There was a crash from behind the door as if something heavy had fallen over and then more laughter. Eddie by now was grinning broadly.

He opened the door and was greeted by utter chaos. He'd expected Rachel to give Michael some coloured pens and paper and then leave him to his own devices while she got on with her work and it seemed that she'd started off doing just that. There were child's drawings on the desk. At some point she'd apparently given up on her paperwork and started drawing with him as some of the pictures had definitely not been done by a three year-old. What had happened next was unclear - Michael and Rachel appeared to have spent some time chasing each other round the office. Most of the paperwork had been knocked from Rachel's desk and her chair was lying on its side in the middle of the floor. Michael was lying on his back on the sofa, giggling uncontrollably, while a slightly out of breath Rachel tried to tickle him. The two of them froze, looking a little guilty, as they heard Eddie come in.

'He stole my pen.' Rachel said by way of explanation, still laughing.

Looking slightly sheepish, Michael pulled the pen from his pocket and returned it to Rachel who took it from him, smiling. On impulse, she kissed his head and he crawled onto her lap, putting his arms around her neck. Then, turning to Eddie, he said, with all seriousness, 'Rachel's cool.'

'I'm glad you think so because I think Rachel's cool too.' Eddie replied, joining them on the sofa.

Rachel blushed and kept her eyes focused on Michael, but, when Eddie reached out and wrapped an arm around her shoulders to hold both her and Michael close to him, Rachel didn't resist.

**Steph, Matt and Jasmine**

'I still like my plan better,' Matt said sulkily.

'Matt we have discussed why locking people in cupboards and then expecting them to declare their eternal love for each other never works.' Steph sounded a little exasperated. Matt's artistic temperament could be trying at times. 'Jasmine's plan is much more sensible.'

Matt glared at Jasmine who took a sip of her coffee, looking smug. It was break time and the three of them were sat in the corner of the staffroom, gossiping. As usual.

'So,' Steph leaned forward. 'Let's run through this one more time, Jas.'

'It's just like in 'Much Ado'...'

'Well, we don't all have your encyclopaedic knowledge of Shakespeare.'

Matt sniggered and Jasmine glared at him.

'It's really very simple,' Jasmine explained a little wearily. She'd already gone through this several times. 'Basically we let Eddie overhear us talking about how great Rachel thinks he is and then we let Rachel overhear us talking about how great Eddie thinks she is.'

'It won't work,' said Matt decisively. 'Eddie and Rachel would never confide in us.

'Of course they would. Everyone confides in me.' This was from Steph.

'No, Steph, you just think everyone confides in you because you eavesdrop on them confiding in other people.' Matt replied.

Steph looked hurt, but was distracted by the sight of Eddie coming into the staffroom. He was followed by Rachel who was carrying Eddie's son. The little boy had clearly decided that he liked Rachel. He had wrapped his arms around her neck and was chattering away to her animatedly.

'That is so cute!' exclaimed Jasmine. 'We have to get them together now!'

On the other side of the staffroom, Eddie wondered briefly what Steph, Matt and Jasmine were up to. There was a definite air of conspiracy about them. His attention though was soon drawn back to Michael and Rachel. He loved seeing them together getting on so well. They were the two people he loved most in the world and the thought that perhaps, one day, they could grow to care for each other as well filled him with a wonderful warm feeling of happiness.

**Rachel**

Michael ended up spending the rest of the day in Rachel's office. They played tag round the furniture and built a house out of old paper clips and told each other stories. Rachel got no work done at all, but she didn't really mind - she found that she loved spending time with him. It was so easy and carefree and he reminded her so much of Eddie. He had the same mannerisms, the same facial expressions. Sometimes he even talked in the same way as Eddie. Rachel couldn't help wondering if a child of hers and Eddie's would be like Michael. She started to mentally plan their life together before she could stop herself. They would live in a cottage in the country with a stream running through the garden and they would have three, no, four children, two boys and two girls and Michael would spend the holidays there... Rachel mentally kicked herself. It could never happen, not with her scar and her shameful past. She was surprised that Eddie wanted Michael coming anywhere near her.

By the end of the day, Michael was worn out and Rachel was starting to feel tired herself. She was sat on the sofa with Michael asleep in her arms, his forehead leaning against her, his arms round her neck. Rachel allowed her chin to rest gently on the top of his head. She smiled to herself, thinking that maybe she wasn't quite as useless with children as she'd first thought. She slowly became aware that someone was watching her and she looked up to see Eddie standing in the doorway. Her smile widened.

'Hi.' she said and a lot of emotion managed to work its way into that little word.

'Hey.' was his response, equally emotive. He grinned at the two of them. 'That's a lovely picture.' he said, looking at them together.

'You have a lovely son.' was Rachel's reply.

'What have you done to him to wear him out so much?' asked Eddie, laughing a little as he came to sit beside them.

'He's worn me out.' said Rachel, laughing too.

Eddie reached out to take Michael from her, but the boy only half woke up and clung to Rachel harder, declaring 'Rachel's my friend!.'

Eddie and Rachel exchanged amused grins over the top of his head. 'How about you and I take Rachel out to dinner to say thank-you for keeping you entertained all day?' Suggested Eddie.

Michael nodded.

'How about it, Rach?'

'I'd like that,' Rachel grinned. She seemed to have been smiling a lot just recently.

**Eddie**

They ate at Pizza Hut - Michael had picked the venue. There was a slightly embarrassing moment when Janeece Bryant, who turned out to be working there as a waitress, winked rather obviously at Eddie who recalled their earlier conversation on the bus and blushed an impressive shade of scarlet. Rachel started to question him about it, but Eddie quickly changed the subject. Apart from that, it was a lovely meal.

Michael insisted on sitting next to Rachel and occasionally even sitting on Rachel. He chattered away to her constantly, gazing at her adoringly and the whole time, although he didn't know it, Eddie's expression perfectly mirrored his son's whenever he glanced in Rachel's direction. He was fleetingly and irrationally jealous of the familiarity of the two of them - Michael was constantly reaching up to play with Rachel's hair and Rachel kissed his head and took his hand without a second thought. Eddie couldn't understand why Rachel didn't have any children of her own. She was a natural with them and being around Michael was clearly making her very happy. Eddie couldn't help wondering what a child of theirs might look like and he smiled to himself as he imagined a little girl with Rachel's strawberry blond hair and deep brown eyes. Rachel's gaze caught his own across the table and he wondered if there was any chance she might perhaps be thinking the same thing as him.

After dinner, they returned to Eddie's house. Rachel started to say goodbye to Michael, but he begged her to stay and put him to bed, so she did, kissing him goodnight and wishing him sweet dreams. Very soon, Rachel and Eddie were in Eddie's living room, drinking tea and talking softly.

'You're so good with him.' Eddie leaned back against the end of the sofa. To his surprise, Rachel nestled up against him with her feet tucked under her and her head on his shoulder. He kissed her hair, but knew better than to go any further this time.

'I've always wanted children.' Rachel said with a note of sadness in her voice.

Eddie felt privileged and touched that she was confiding in him. She was usually so very reserved.

'Why do you think you've never had kids?' he asked before he could stop himself and then hastily added 'sorry, that's none of my business.'

Rachel took his hand and stroked her fingers across it absent-mindedly. 'I haven't really been in a proper relationship. Ever.' she finally admitted. 'I've always been too afraid.'

'What were you afraid of, Rach?'

'Oh I don't know - I probably have commitment issues or something.' She was trying to lighten the mood and Eddie realized that the subject was closed for the time being. Rachel had spent a lifetime putting up barriers around herself, fencing in her emotions and Eddie knew it would take time to break those barriers down. He stroked her hair, letting her know he was there for her, would always be there for her. Then he moved the conversation on to happier topics.

They talked late into the night and both of them knew that Rachel would be staying, although neither of them said it out loud. Rachel phoned Philip to check that he was ok and to tell him that she was staying with Jasmine, an excuse which she wasn't sure Philip would believe, and then followed Eddie upstairs. They fell asleep in each other's arms as they had done for the previous three nights and both secretly wanted to do for every night to come. A short while later though, their peace was disturbed by a small person climbing over Rachel and inserting himself between the two of them. Rachel groaned sleepily as Eddie turned on the light. Michael was settling himself more comfortably in the middle of the bed.

'Michael...?' Eddie was too half-asleep to form a coherent question

.  
>'I had a bad dream.' Michael said.<p>

'Do you want to talk about it?' Rachel asked.

'No,' Michael shook his head. 'Can I stay here with you though?'

'If Rachel's ok with it...' Eddie wasn't awake enough to argue.

'Of course I'm ok with it.' Rachel replied, gathering Michael to her. The two of them quickly drifted back to sleep, but Eddie, with a sudden moment of wakefulness, looked down at Michael and Rachel sleeping peacefully in his arms and felt suddenly content.

**Rachel**

Rachel woke feeling blissfully happy. Eddie's arms encircled her in a gentle cocoon of love and warmth and Michael was squeezed in between the two of them. Rachel felt suddenly protective of the little boy. She kissed his head and stroked his hair. Like his father, Michael was definitely not a morning person and Rachel found that she enjoyed this quiet time when she was free to simply watch the two of them sleep. Michael was sucking his thumb in an adorable fashion and Eddie was smiling slightly as he slept. Rachel wondered what he was dreaming about and was glad that it was clearly such a happy dream.

Alison came to collect Michael in the morning while Rachel sat at the breakfast table in a dressing gown belonging to Eddie. Alison looked surprised at this new turn of events, but not overly surprised. Rachel suspected that Alison had seen the spark between them long ago. Alison smiled to see Michael sat on Rachel's lap and Rachel felt even more content. She wanted there to be no hard feelings between Michael's mother and herself.  
>When Eddie and Rachel were left alone, they ate in companionable silence. Rachel would happily have chattered away, but she was quickly learning that Eddie was not naturally chatty this early in the morning. Instead, Rachel was content to observe him over the top of her coffee cup, thinking that the slightly dazed expression on his half-asleep features was the sweetest thing she'd seen in a long time.<p>

They drove to work in separate cars and the fifteen minutes of separation was almost too much to bear. Rachel silently cursed herself for having so little strength of will where Eddie was concerned and then she cursed herself again at how elated she felt when he came to her office before registration. They talked only of mundane things, but, all the time, there was an undercurrent of something else, something deeper and stronger, running through the conversation. Their eyes lingered on each other a little too long, their hands touched a little too often. When they walked the corridors at break, they walked so close that they were constantly touching. At lunch, they sat next to each other in the staffroom and Rachel allowed herself to sit so close to him that her shoulder was brushing against his. The soft caress of his shirt against her top was enough to send shivers ad electricity running through her. Every time he passed her a book or some papers, their fingers would graze against each other as if drawn by some magnetic force and the contact would be maintained a moment longer than was necessary. Rachel loved to be with him, felt bereft every second they were apart, and found his presence intoxicating. She wanted to kiss him, to touch him, to hold him and yet, every time tried to something, some part of herself would resist, but Rachel was determined that, at some point, she would finally overcome that part of herself.

**Philip**

Steph, Matt and Jasmine weren't the only ones who had noticed Eddie and Rachel's new found closeness. Philip had seen it too. In many ways, Philip was a strange individual with strange ideas and a slightly obsessive personality particularly where Flick Mellor was concerned, but deep down, he was kind and he usually meant well. He had noticed the way Rachel's face lit up whenever she talked about Eddie or saw him in the distance and he had seen the special smile which crept across Rachel's face whenever Eddie was in the room. Philip cared deeply for his aunt - she had been far more of a mother to him than Melissa ever had. He wanted more than anything for Rachel to be happy and he wanted Eddie to be happy too so he could perhaps rid himself of some of the guilt he felt over the way his mother had treated Eddie.

Philip had first noticed the changes in Eddie and Rachel's behaviour that night after he'd left them alone in the bowling alley. He had no idea what had happened between them, but something had. He also sensed that they were still holding something back - he didn't know what this something could be though as he was all too aware, despite Rachel's efforts at concealment, that she and Eddie had been sleeping in the same bed for nearly a week now. Philip somehow knew that they were still not quite together and that they could never be completely happy until they were together. He therefore decided that it was his moral duty to get them together.

During the course of the school day, he managed to speak to them both alone, which, in itself, was quite an accomplishment as they seemed always to be together. He persuaded them both to go out for a meal with him that evening. It was his way of thanking them, he said, for looking after him. Then, he booked a table at the restaurant and said he'd meet them there. In reality, he was intending to stay at Bolton's house. Leaving them alone together once had led to their current closeness and he sincerely hoped that leaving them alone together twice might finally allow them to fully admit their feelings for one another.

**Rachel**

For some reason, Rachel wasn't surprised when she and Eddie arrived at the restaurant to find that Philip had booked a table for two, not three. Nor was she surprised to find that he'd requested and paid for a bottle of the most expensive wine. There was a vase of pink roses on the table and the lighting was dim.

'Do you think Philip is maybe trying to tell us something?' Eddie said, smiling as they sat down.

Rachel didn't reply. She stroked one of the rose petals absent-mindedly, noticing how Eddie's eyes followed the movements of her hand. This situation was too obviously romantic for her to feel comfortable. It had connotations which she just wasn't ready for yet.  
>'Do you want to go somewhere else?' Eddie's concern meant a lot to her. She was always amazed at the way he put her needs before his own.<p>

Rachel shook her head. 'This is fine.' She didn't want to appear childish.

Despite her fears, the meal was an enjoyable one. Eddie was clearly making an effort to keep the conversation light and neutral which Rachel appreciated. She loved to watch him while he spoke, loved to see him enthusiastic and animated, loved the way the light from the candle in the middle of the table flickered over his face creating shadows and pools of light. It gave him an air of mystery, a depth, a wisdom almost which intrigued her. He was a deeply complex man and she wanted more than anything to understand him and to have him understand her.

After dinner, neither of them were ready to go home, so they went for a walk down a country lane near the restaurant. The world was dark around them and Rachel felt that perhaps she should be afraid, but no fear was there. She could not fear with Eddie's warm presence beside her. After a while, he gently took her hand and she smiled up at him. The night was cold, but his hand was warm and it filled her body with a different kind of warmth entirely. There was a gate ahead of them, blocking their path. When they reached it, Rachel stopped and leaned on it, looking around her, drinking in the sights of a world made brighter and better and lovelier by the presence of the man beside her. As if sensing her thoughts, Eddie slipped his arm around her waist and it seemed to fit perfectly there. Rachel leaned into him. The stars shone down above them like glittering diamonds strewn across a carpet of softest black velvet. Rachel was amazed by the size of the cosmos above her and she snuggled closer to Eddie, needing reassurance that she wasn't alone in this vast glittering universe.

'The stars are so beautiful.' she whispered.

'Not as beautiful as you, my love.' His voice was low, husky, dripping with desire.

Rachel turned in his arms involuntarily so that they were facing each other, eyes locked together in a communion which was more than words. Both his arms encircled her waist and her hands were on his shoulders. Their faces were drawing closer. Some part of Rachel was still protesting, but she would have let him kiss her, even if she wasn't ready for it, because she couldn't stand the thought of losing him. Some of her hesitation must have shown in her eyes though; Eddie's hands dropped from her waist and he looked away, while Rachel looked at the ground, ashamed of her own hesitation.

'Do you want to go home?' he asked after a while.

'No,' Rachel said, suddenly decisive. 'I want to make you understand.

**Eddie**

Rachel was walking quickly, so quickly that Eddie was having to jog a little to keep up. They had gone through the gate, into the field behind it and up a hill. He had no idea where they were going, but he sensed that Rachel wouldn't respond well to questions at this point in time.

Eventually they reached the top of the hill and Rachel stopped and sat down with her back resting against the trunk of a tree. Eddie sat beside her, being careful not to touch her. He didn't want his actions to be misinterpreted. Rachel though was staring off onto the distance, in her own world. She seemed to have forgotten that he was there.

'Rach?' he asked tentatively.

She looked at him sharply, perhaps only just remembering his presence. 'I wanted us to be somewhere we wouldn't be disturbed.' she said, gesturing vaguely at the empty countryside around them.

'Well I doubt anyone else will be all the way up here at this time of night.' He knew she wasn't listening, but he wanted to fill the silence between them. Rachel remained caught up in her own thoughts and he knew that he would have to wait for her to speak.

'I always loved the stars when I was a little girl.' she said at last, her voice startling him ' They don't judge you. They shine on everyone, no matter who you are or what you've done or if you're loved or not.'

'I'm sure you were loved, Rach.' He couldn't imagine how anyone could fail to love her.

'My mother didn't love me. She never wanted me and she hated my father.' There was a pause and then 'Melissa is my half-sister. Did you know that?'

He shook his head.

'Mel was the one they wanted, my mother and her new husband. I was a stain, a scar on their perfect family. I tried to talk to my mother about the things that I loved, about the stars, but she wasn't interested, she wouldn't allow herself to care for the things I cared for...anyway, when I was seventeen I couldn't stand that house any longer so I left, went on the game and that's why I can't give myself to you like I want to.'

'I still don't understand, Rach.' he said gently. He knew that she didn't want to talk any more, but he couldn't let the conversation end there. 'Rachel, I don't care about what you did in the past, it's what you're doing now, who you are now which matters.'

Rachel looked at the ground, hiding her face from him. 'Every day there were new hands on me, new voices whispering in my ear and, afterwards, they would cry or they would hit me or they would call me names and it hurt and the only way to stop it hurting was to shut myself away from them, to never let myself give them anything more than my body.'

'I won't hurt you, Rach.'

'I know that. I'm worried that once we were together, you'd leave. I know it's stupid, but that's the world I'm used to - men take what they want and then you never see them again. What is there for them to stay for?'

She looked so desolate sitting there in the dark with her arms wrapped round her knees that he could no longer refrain from touching her. He took her delicate hands in his and looked into her eyes.

'Rachel, I'd like to be with you, but what I feel for you goes far, far beyond the physical. I don't care if we never have sex, if you never let me kiss you. I love you in a way I've never loved anyone else. I'll never leave you and I'll never stop wanting to be with you.'

She seemed stunned by his declaration. She drew back and stared at him for a moment and then gently, so gently he almost didn't feel it, she leant forwards and brushed her lips lightly against his. Then she leaned back, making it clear that she would go no further tonight. 'Thank you, Eddie,' she whispered, leaning her forehead against his and then allowing herself to be pulled into his arms. Eddie was so overwhelmed by her actions that he simply held her, not knowing what to say.

After a while she spoke again. 'For me a kiss is more than it is for you.'

'I don't understand.'

'People like me, prostitutes I mean, don't kiss. It's the one thing they...we...don't do - it's too personal. So, when I kiss you, I give you something of myself, the one thing I haven't shared out with anyone who wanted it, and I want to be ready before I do that. It's not that I don't love you, because I do, more than anything, it's just that kissing you the way you'd like me to means I have to break down the biggest barrier of all and that takes time.'

Suddenly everything became clear to him and he held her tighter. 'Now I understand.' he whispered and kissed Rachel's hair and, together, they lay quietly against the tree stump and were watched only by the stars.

**Eddie**

They lay in the pool of starlight on the side of the hill in a universe made dreamlike by the lateness of the hour and the closeness of their bodies. Rachel was draped across Eddie's chest. His fingers were in her hair, moving slowly, rhythmically back and forth. She was relaxed against him, her feet tangled up with his. She felt light, free, joyful almost. Her admission was like a weight which had suddenly been lifted from her body. Now he knew why she couldn't do what he wanted her to do. If he objected or wished her to do differently then she supposed that that would be the end of their non-affair. Such an end would pierce her heart, crush her entirely, but at least it would be an ending which was on her terms and she would know that she had tried her best to help him understand her feelings. Miraculously though, Eddie seemed to have accepted what she had said, seemed to be prepared to wait and didn't seem to be thinking of ending anything just yet. Now they lay here in gentle stillness, not speaking, but still saying many things.

'I love you.' Eddie whispered suddenly, his voice making her jump in the darkness.

'And I love you.' she replied, a smile in her voice. The answer came easily, automatically and was the absolute truth.

The night grew colder and the stars grew brighter and Eddie drew her ever closer to him. Soon though, they realized that they would have to leave or they would stay there forever. They stood up reluctantly and Eddie kept an arm wrapped around Rachel's waist. They drove back to Rachel's house, both ensuring that there was never a moment when they weren't touching. When they arrived, they both knew that Eddie would be staying the night. Philip was still out at Bolton's so they had the house to themselves. They drank hot chocolate snuggled up together on Rachel's sofa, each delighting in the closeness of the other, neither able to stop smiling. Something had happened this night - they weren't sure of the exact nature of it, but they were sure it was something good, something filled with the promise of better things to come. Eventually, they drifted up the stairs and lay in Rachel's bed, wrapped around each other, loving the feeling of touching in this way. It was comforting and safe. No words were needed any more - they had moved on to a different level of communication now. Rachel kissed Eddie's cheek lightly and he kissed Rachel's hair, asking for nothing more than she was able to give him, and then they drifted off into a quiet, contented sleep and dreamed dreams filled with each other.

**Steph, Matt and Jasmine**

Matt, Steph and Jasmine watched and waited for an opportunity to implement their 'Much Ado About Nothing' plan. Rachel and Eddie though never seemed to go anywhere alone. Eventually, after a week of watching and waiting, Steph received a frantic text from Matt; he and Jasmine were alone in the staffroom and Rachel was in the supply cupboard next door, sorting out what new stationary she needed to order, and could hear everything which was being said in the staffroom. Steph hurried to join them and found Matt and Jasmine talking quietly in a corner while, on the other side of the room, the door of the supply cupboard was slightly ajar.

As Steph sat down, Matt raised his eyebrows at her and nodded, signalling that they were about to put their plan into action. Steph had trouble hiding her excitement - meddling in other people's affairs was her favourite pastime. She settled back in her chair and said, in a voice loud enough to be heard by everyone in the building let alone the nearby supply cupboard 'And are you sure that he loves her so entirely?'

Matt sighed theatrically 'So says everyone.'

'Then why don't we tell her that he loves her?' Steph took care to project her voice as much as was humanly possible.

Matt sighed again, placing a hand on his forehead 'because, if we care for him, we should never tell him.'

'And why not?' Steph tried to sound confused and was impressed by her own acting skills.

At this point, Jasmine, who getting a little too enthusiastic and knew the play a little too well, cut in with 'I know he doth deserve/As much as may be yielded to a man/But nature never framed a woman's heart/Of prouder stuff than hers/ And therefore certainly it were not good/She knew his love lest she make sport of it...OW!'

The rather abrupt end to Jasmine's speech was caused by Steph stamping on her foot and hissing 'too mush Shakespeare!' while Jasmine looked slightly embarrassed.

Matt tried to save the situation by adding some Shakespeare of his own and saying loudly 'She turns every man the wrong side out.'

'But he's a really great guy and they would be really good together!' put in Steph who had never actually read the play, but was determined not to be left out.

Their conversation was brought to a sudden end at that point by Rachel emerging from the supply cupboard and walking in the direction of her office. She gave them a confused glance as she passed them. When Rachel had gone, Steph sat back in her chair, looking distinctly pleased with herself. 'I think that went well.' she said, smugly.

Rachel meanwhile was walking towards her office wondering why on earth Steph, Matt and Jasmine appeared to be rehearsing a modernist re-working of 'Much Ado About Nothing' in the middle of the staffroom.

**Eddie**

It was the day of another school trip - this time to Kew Gardens. Eddie had spent the night curled up around Rachel, in her bed this time. He was starting to realize though that the location didn't matter - wherever Rachel was was his home. She was all he wanted, all he needed. Leaving her this morning and knowing that he wouldn't see her again during the drive to work seemed to create a void of loneliness in his soul, a void only she could fill and, suddenly, as he arrived at the school there she was.

She stepped from her car and looked around her and his heart leapt, filled with knowledge that she was looking for him and only him. They were setting off early, hoping to spend the whole day at Kew, so it was still dark outside. The light from the stars picked out the highlights in Rachel's hair, danced in her eyes, made her seem delicate, ethereal. For a moment she looked lost and then those beautiful, sparkling eyes focused on him and she looked sure of herself again.

'Hi.' she said, coming towards him, smiling a smile of the kind which were reserved for him alone.

'Hey,' he smiled in return. 'I missed you.'

She reached out quickly and touched his hand. The contact lasted less than a second, but it made delicious electricity shoot through him and it reassured him of her tangible presence. She was real and wonderful and smiling just for him. That was the only moment they had to themselves for a while. All too soon, the students and the other staff began to arrive, surrounding them, separating them, but Eddie made sure that he held Rachel in his eyes as he couldn't hold her in his arms.

When they got on the coach, Eddie sat down at the front, leaving a space for Rachel beside him. He was reminded of the journey to the Duke of Edinburgh campsite - the memory of her blanking him and going to sit with Jasmine was still a painful one. Now though, things had changed entirely. Rachel came and sat down beside him without hesitation and he couldn't stop a wide grin from spreading across his face. She had chosen his company over the company of others and it meant more to him than could easily be expressed in words. He longed to out his arm around her, to draw her close to him, but he couldn't, not with Steph sat behind them and Tom on the other side of the aisle, so Eddie compromised by sitting as close to Rachel as he could, so their shoulders were pressed together and they could almost feel that they were in a world entirely their own. Rachel seemed to appreciate this closeness - she passed him a packet of mints and, while doing so, allowed her hand to quickly squeeze his.

**Eddie**

Eddie couldn't stop marvelling at how different this trip was to the Duke of Edinburgh expedition. The sun was shining, it was warm and dry and they were currently on a boat being taken around a lake instead of having to walk around the lake for themselves. His feet didn't hurt, he hadn't spent the last two days living on half-cooked pasta and not much else and he'd had a decent night's sleep last night. The biggest and best change though was in Rachel. She hasn't left hi side all day. Whenever they spoke, she looked up into his face and smiled her beautiful smile and never once tried to look away. He delighted in her openness, in the knowledge that if he reached out to take her hand she would let him.

Eddie leaned on the rail of the boat and Rachel stood beside him, only a breath away. He could feel the heat from her body dancing on his skin and it intoxicated him. Rachel was gazing out at the view, but Eddie had his eyes firmly fixed on her. The details of her face, her body were already imprinted on his memory, but her face changed so much from moment to moment that he wanted to recall it in all its many facets. Right now, she was concentrating on the scene in front of her. Her forehead was a little furrowed and she was biting her lip slightly. He loved it when she did that. Perhaps feeling his eyes on her, Rachel turned to look at him and smiled that wonderful smile of hers and he smiled back.  
>The moment was broken by a scream and a splash from behind them. Paul and Bolton had grown bored of the boat trip and started fighting over Bolton's iPod and, somehow, Bolton had ended up falling through a gap in the boat's rail and into the water where he was now struggling helplessly.<p>

'He can't swim!' Paul's voice was high with panic.

Eddie didn't think, just acted. He tore off his jacket and ran for the other side of the boat, intending to dive in and pull Bolton out. The deck of the boat was wet from the splash of Bolton's fall and, as he ran, Eddie's foot slipped. He toppled over the side of the boat and the world went dark as he hit his head on the boat's rail. The last thing he heard was a cacophony of shouting voices and Rachel's terrified scream ringing out high above them all.

**Rachel**

Rachel's world imploded. The universe crashed in on her, crushing her, pinning her to the deck of the boat. In front of her eyes, she saw, over and over, Eddie's limp body plunging into the water below. She covered her eyes with her hands and still the image was there. Everything she loved, wanted, needed was falling away from her to be swallowed by that dark water. Around her, there were three men in motion; Tom pulling her back from the place where Eddie had fallen towards which she had been drawn without realizing it and Grantly and Matt diving into the water to pull Eddie and Bolton from the depths. Rachel struggled in Tom's grasp, needing to be nearer to Eddie, but he held her so tightly she couldn't move, could only scream and scream and scream, her throat raw, her lungs burning, her heart feeling as though it would burst.

She had a vague impression of Jasmine's terrified face somewhere near her own and of Bolton coughing in the distance. Tom was speaking to her, but his words made no sense and she couldn't stop screaming for long enough to hear him. All she saw now was Eddie's body lying still and silent on the hard wooden deck. Her need to be near him was primal, unstoppable. She broke free of Tom's grasp and ran to him in a trance of grief and pain and heartache. She could see nothing but his unmoving body, his closed eyes and then, suddenly, without knowing how it happened, she was kneeling beside him, cupping his face in her hands. His face was cold and empty. In a rush of new emotion, Rachel felt the barriers in her mind wash away. It was as though she had been encased in ice and all the ice had suddenly melted. All at once she knew the meaning of love and she wanted to share all of herself with this gentle, caring, wonderful, kind man and she knew that she would do anything to make him wake up again. With no more thought at all, she brought her lips crashing down on his, hoping with every fibre of her being that the stuff of fairytales would prove true and a kiss would be enough to wake him, but he didn't move.

The boat reached the shore of the lake. Out of nowhere, paramedics appeared and pulled Eddie from Rachel's grasp. Tom came forward to place a comforting hand on her shoulder, but she pushed him away, wanting to be alone, knowing that only Eddie could stop her from being alone. Rachel's screams were replaced with a low animalistic moaning and she could think of nothing but him and the time they had wasted and the blank starless void of a possible future without him.

**Eddie**

All Eddie was aware of was pain. Every part of him hurt from the fall and worst of all was the dull throbbing ache in his head. Over time though he started to be able to perceive things other than pain - the feel of an overly starched sheet beneath him, the medicated smell which told him he was in a hospital. The first time he opened his eyes, the light blinded him and he quickly closed them again. The second time he opened his eyes, he saw the most beautiful face in the world and wanted nothing more than to gaze at that face forever. She acted like a cold compress, taking away the pain. She was smiling down at him and her smile was full of love. Eddie smiled back and whispered her name very softly before drifting back into unconsciousness.

When he woke again, he was more aware of his surroundings. Rachel was sitting beside him, holding his hand tightly as if she never wanted to let go.

'Rachel...' he said, amazed that anyone so beautiful, so perfect would love him enough to sit there, holding his hand and waiting for him to wake up.

'How are you feeling?' she murmured. 'You gave me such a fright.'

'My head hurts.' Eddie struggled into a sitting position. 'I'm so glad you're here.'

'I'm not going to leave anytime soon.' She reassured him.

She stood up then, and, keeping hold of his hand, she moved so that she was sitting facing him on the bed.

'I love you.' She breathed softly, stroking the side of his face.

'And I love you.'

Then she did something which he'd long since stopped daring to dream that she'd ever be able to do. She leaned forwards and caught his mouth in a kiss. After a second, she pulled away and looked at him, her eyes searching his face. She seemed to find there whatever it was she was looking for and she kissed him again, deeply this time, firmly, passionately and she kept her lips on his for as long as she possibly could. She broke away for the second it took her to breathe and then she was kissing him again, more urgently this time. Eddie truly understood what it meant for Rachel to give herself to him in this way and he finally felt as though he had found his true place in the universe.  
>Steph, who had come to visit him, stood watching them from the doorway. She grinned to herself. 'I knew that plan would work.' she muttered to no one in particular before turning and leaving them alone with each other.<p>

**Rachel**

Eddie stayed in hospital for three days and Rachel was with him every moment she possibly could be. When he was finally allowed home, they went directly to Rachel's house, neither of them even considering the possibility that they should spend the evening apart. Philip was out with Bolton and Paul, so they had the house to themselves. They moved from the starlight outside to the lamplight inside and, as she closed the door, Rachel felt suddenly shy. The rules of their relationship had changed yet again and she wasn't sure how to act in a world with no boundaries.

Eddie seemed to sense something of what she was feeling. He held her gently by the shoulders and looked into her eyes. 'Rach, if we're moving too fast, we can slow down. I know that what happened at the hospital was probably just because of shock...'

She shook her head violently. 'No, no, I wanted to kiss you, I want to be with you properly. I faced a world without you and it was pointless, so now, I want to be with you in every way I can.'

'Then what' the matter?'

Rachel was embarrassed. 'Believe it or not I don't actually have much experience at this whole relationship thing. I don't really know what to do'

This drew a smile from him. 'I think you'll be able to pick it up as we go along.' he whispered, leaning so close that his breath tickled her ear.

Then he was planting a row of soft butterfly kisses down the side of her throat and trailing his lips along her collarbone. Rachel was unable to stop a soft moan of pleasure escaping her lips, a moan which was silenced when Eddie covered her mouth with his. The kiss was deep and beautiful and sent shivers coursing through Rachel's body. She tangled her fingers in his hair and pressed herself close to him, wanting as much contact as possible. His hands were on her back, under her top, running up and down her body as if wanting to trace every inch of her. He broke the kiss and Rachel felt suddenly bereft, but their lips only parted long enough for him to remove her top and toss it to the floor. Her fingers fumbled with the buttons of his shirt until, finally, all barriers removed, they touched skin-to-skin. It was like fire and ice all at once and Rachel never wanted it to stop. Still kissing her, Eddie picked her up easily and carried her up the stairs, leaving various items of clothing in a heap in the hallway for Philip to find and, no doubt be slightly freaked out by, when he came home later.

Once upstairs, Eddie deposited Rachel on the bed and sat beside her, kissing her gently, lazily. He was taunting her with his slow, delicate kisses, causing her excitement to rise to fever pitch. When she could stand it no more, her hands went to the buckle of his belt and soon all clothes had been discarded, allowing Rachel to feel the contours of his hard, muscled body beneath her fingertips. She had never realized that she could feel this way. Their kisses were becoming hungry again, frantic. Rachel lay back on the bed, pulling Eddie down with her, so his body was hovering above her own. Nothing had ever felt so right before. Suddenly though, his kisses stopped and he gazed down at her with an expression of utter seriousness.

'What's wrong?' she asked a little breathlessly.

'Are you sure this is what you want?'

'I'm sure.'

'You won't wake up in the morning and regret it?'

'Eddie, I love you and I want to be with you and I have never been quite so ready for anything as I am now.'

This seemed to be all the reassurance he needed. A smile broke across his face and he kissed Rachel again even more passionately than before.

**Eddie**

Rachel was the world and the world was Rachel. He was hers and she was his and the universe was theirs. The future glittered with possibilities and opportunities and was filled with Rachel's dazzling smile.

She was asleep now, curled up on his chest, looking wonderfully at peace with the world. Eddie had his arms wrapped tightly around her body and his chin was resting on her head. His mind was filled with delicious memories of the previous few hours and the image of her danced before his mind's eye. The air was heavy with the scent of her perfume. He had thought that holding her platonically was as close to bliss as it was humanly possible to come. Now he knew different- this communion of bodies, of souls was a hundred, no a hundred thousand times better.

Rachel stirred in her sleep and murmured something before draping her body more comfortably over his. He loved the feel of her breath gently caressing his skin and he couldn't cease to be amazed at how free and easy she was with him now. His fingers idly played with a strand of her hair and he kissed her head, not with the intention of waking her, but just because he couldn't resist.

Rachel though was a light sleeper. She opened her eyes and stretched and smiled up at him. Still half-asleep, she kissed him slightly clumsily and he smiled aghast her lips, drinking in the sensation of her body being so close to his. As Rachel woke up, her kisses grew more intense and her hands began to run all over his body. Eventually though, she paused for breath.

'Morning sleepy-head.' he whispered.

'Morning.' she replied with another kiss.

'I love you, Rachel Mason. Have I told you that recently?'

'You might have mentioned it.' she said, between kisses.

They were interrupted by the sound of the alarm clock on Rachel's bedside table. She flicked it off and groaned. 'Do we have to get up?'

Eddie laughed. 'Does Miss Mason want to skive school then?' he teased.

'Perhaps Miss Mason has better things to do today than go to school.' was her reply as she started trailing kisses down his chest.

Eventually though, they surrendered to the inevitable and left the comfort of the bed, but they left it in the knowledge that they would soon return. As Eddie watched Rachel across the breakfast table he was suddenly struck with the realization that he had found hi place in the universe and that everything was now exactly as it should be.

**Rachel**

Rachel lay on her back, looking up at the stars above her garden. The grass was slightly damp with dew, but she didn't mind; it was a balmy summer evening and the cool of the grass was welcome. Her head was nestled into Eddie's shoulder and he had an arm wrapped around her. Rachel raised her hand and lazily examined the ring on her finger as it glittered in the starlight. Eddie saw what she was doing and grinned broadly at her. Rachel finished examining the ring and rolled onto her side, so that her whole body was pressed against his.

'I can't believe this is our fifth wedding anniversary.' she whispered.

'Best five years of my life.' Eddie whispered back.

In response, Rachel kissed him deeply and passionately. Both still felt a thrill at this touch and Rachel still felt wonder at the fact that she was able to be like this with him, that all her barriers had been broken down.

Eddie's kisses were hungry and Rachel responded with a similar hunger, her fingers moving to his shirt, starting to undo the buttons. They were interrupted though by the sound of light footsteps on the grass beside them.

'I can't sleep.' A little girl in a night dress stood watching them, clutching a teddy bear. She was only just three, but already she had Eddie's soft brown eyes and easy smile and Rachel's strawberry blond hair and musical laugh.

'Why can't you sleep, sweetheart?' Eddie asked.

The little girl shrugged and started to absent-mindedly chewed the ear of her teddy bear. Rachel smiled at her beautiful daughter and holdout a hand to her. 'Come here, darling.' she said.

The girl went to her parents and was welcomed with open arms. She lay down between them and soon she was asleep. Eddie wrapped his arm more securely around his wife and daughter and smiled a smile of pure contentment.

Rachel's eyes wandered back to the stars above them. One of her hands rested lightly on her stomach - she would have to tell Eddie about the new baby soon and he knew he would be delighted, but that could wait. For now, Rachel wanted to enjoy this moment of quiet and peace and happiness now that she was fairly sure that she was loved and now that she was finally truly happy.


End file.
